Remnants vs. The County Council

17:45, Wednesday, August 21, 2013
Fitzwilliam College

Remnants (112/7 in 15 8-ball overs)
lost to
The County Council (115/6 in 14 8-ball overs)
by 4 wickets.

John Moore is driven to (an early) drink by the sight of Andy Owen's nipples; Catherine Owen looks on in understandable embarrassment.

Report by Daniel Mortlock:

In what is possibly a first for a Remnants evening fixture, the result of today's match was decided before 6pm. Actually starting early for once, we chose to bat first, sending out three of our most trusted run scorers (combined Remnants record prior to today: 11334 runs at 32.85) in the hope of controlling the match from ball one. Which is precisely what didn't happen: after 3 very good (8-ball) overs we were in shock at 9/3; Messrs Serby (Sr.), Williams and Owen had added just 3 runs to their combined career tally; and the match was all but over.

Samuel Serby gets on the front foot.

Our middle order of Samuel Serby (26 off 27 balls, keeping a cool head when all around had lost theirs), John Moore (13 off 21 balls, with excellent running) and Daniel Mortlock (29 off 17 balls, mainly the result of being provided with a healthy diet of slow, leg-side full-tosses) mounted an impressive comeback, scoring 74/1 off the next 8 overs, but at no stage did we look in danger of posting a winning total. Following another mini-collapse, Rob Harvey (6 off 6 balls), Naveen Chouksey (11* off 11 balls) and Felix Serby (12* off 11 balls) kept the score ticking over nicely in our last few overs, eventually taking us to an almost respectable total of 112/7.

People playing cricket.

Our defense was as valiant as it was futile. Alec Armstrong (1/22) was tight with his left-arm orthodox; Naveen Chouksey (0/17) and Daniel Mortlock (1/19) sent some lovely deliveries sliding tantalisingly past the outside edge; Catherine Owen (0/22) deceived with flight (although was a little bit too "leg theory"); Andy Owen (2/10) deservedly tightened his grip on the bowling averages with our best spell of the day; and Felix Serby (1/17) induced the day's Lemonade Moment when he deceived a well-set batsmen with his drift and had him well caught. Rather nicely, the catch was taken by dad Tom, who'd had to run back from extra cover - although the only reason he was even in the vicinity was because Andy had unilaterally moved him there the ball before. That wasn't the only good bit of fielding, of course: Naveen saved lots of runs at backward square-leg; Rob Harvey was solid on the long boundary; and Daniel and 'keeper Samuel combined for a nice run out when the batsmen went for an absurdly cheeky - no, downright rude - second run . . . but somehow we never quite clicked, and it was always a case of clapping good throws that might have resulted in run outs if they'd been just a foot to the left, or complimenting sharp movement prior to a fumbled pick-up. Maybe it was the orange ball (or balls, since we kept losing the primary orb, only have someone find it a few balls later), or just late-season blues - or maybe it's just the inescapable fact that we're never going to do the sort of things we see on the telly. Whatever, our whole time in the field had a "nearly" feel about it, and the fact that we didn't even force the game into the final over says sums things up rather nicely.

Serbys Felix and Samuel hungry for more cricket.

The early finish (mainly the result of the early start and the absence of any bowlers with long run ups) meant that just about everyone had time to stay for a pint or two - or a glass of the squash being sold by the enterprising youngsters, who thus raised a goodly sum for cancer research. But while most of us rehydrated after a decidedly warm evening's exercise, our recouperation was mocked by the two younger Serbys, who tirelessly practised their IPL-style "catch the ball and throw it back into play while falling over the boundary" routine. One can but hope that either Felix or Samuel pulls off this stunt in a Remnants game next year.