Remnants vs. King's College, London

May 9, 1981

King's College, London (169/6 in 38 6-ball overs)
Remnants (83/8 in 35 6-ball overs)

Report by Geoff Hales and Anton Garrett, as (repeatedly) told to Daniel Mortlock:

King's College batted first and posted a healthy total of 169/6 from their 38 overs. In principle it seemed that we might be able to chase this down, but it rapidly became clear that we weren't going to go close, as there was a steady stream of wickets. Only Simon Prior* (23), Steve Gull (20), Clark Brunt (12) and Joe Finer (10) made it into double figures, and when we fell to 83/8 with 12 overs remaining it seemed that a King's victory was just a matter of time.

Still, while the win had long gone, there was something to fight for, as Geoff Hales confirmed to the new batsman Anton Garrett: the captains had agreed on a time game, so there was still the draw to play for. Anton and Geoff each decided that they could handle the bowling from "their" ends, with Anton noting in particular that the medium pacer he was facing kept bowling the same delivery over and over. With Geoff expressing minimal confidence in number 11 James Albinson (who'd only once scored more than 1 in his Remnants career to date) it was a case of stubbornly stone-walling . . . and this they did, both facing precisely 36 balls in an epic 0-run partnership (needless to say, the slowest in club history). Their efforts were rewarded not just with the draw, and not just with the season's Champagne Moment award, but with positions on the coveted slowest innings leaderboard. Geoff's innings of 6* off 40 balls was certainly a decent effort in that regard, but it was Anton who managed statistical perfection, facing 36 dot balls to finish on the grandest 0* in club history.

Geoff and Anton came off expecting a heroes' welcome from the rest of the team, but they'd long since given up hope and repaired to the bar to drown their sorrows - and so were happily surprised at the news from the trenches.

*Simon Prior was a son of Jim Prior, the most left-wing of Margaret Thatcher's cabinet. There are tales of Prior Sr. taking part in a whisky drinking contest while an army officer in India, recounted in Simon Raven's entertainingly scurrilous autobiography Shadows on the Grass.